2013-01-29

"The Help" lied to me


Obviously this scene was memorable to me.  The minute that clueless blonde lady stuck her finger into a frying pan full of boiling grease because "it looks like frosting!" I fell in love with her.  Hence, when our stupid toilet seat hinge started squeaking, this was the first thing that popped into my mind.

Well, that's a lie.  WD40 was the first thing, but this scene was a quick second.  Were there warning signs?  Sure.  I never use mayonnaise... Crisco as a makeup supplement is just an awful, awful idea...  and there are fewer things to bring on a heart attack faster than deep frying in Crisco.  I probably should have assumed the squeaky hinge thing was just as ill-advised.

I didn't.

'Wouldn't it be nice to fix this with something non-toxic', I told myself.  'And to take a wise, sassy character's advice!  Besides, what am I going to do, walk all the way across the driveway to the garage?  No thank you!'

Which is why our toilet seat still squeaks every time it's lifted and lowered... and why it's now covered in globs of glistening, greasy, butter-scented Crisco.

UPDATE:

It took 2 or 3 days, but it worked.  My apologies to Minny Jackson.  You see how contrite I am?  I took 13 seconds to go to IMDB and look up the character's name :)

2 comments:

  1. LOL Oh Lindsey, my mother used to mix two phrases and say "you buttered your bread, now lie in it" Somehow that came to mind here.

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  2. ... a little laughter at the end of the day. How surprising and lovely. Almost time to go lie in my buttered bread.... or sit on my Crisco toilet seat.

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